Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Sex, porn, and Eva Longoria

PLEASE NOTE: Some portions of this entry may not be suitable for children, the elderly, or anyone who blushes at the mention of the words penis, vagina, or raging cock monster.  (Actually I don't use the phrase raging cock monster anywhere in the actual post, it's just fun to say.  Raging cock monster.  You may now continue.)

It is about time I tackled the issue of sex here in Untitled Life.  Popular thought holds that sex is dirty and taboo.  From the youngest ages we are taught by our parents that sex should not be openly talked about by their own unwillingness to bring it up.  By the time my parents worked up the nerve to bring it up I had already sorted through all of the previous year's Club magazine (for the articles of course) and was working on the new collectors album issue.  My parents to this day still don't use the scientific words penis and vagina.  Oral and anal sex were never mentioned and anything but the most rudimentary forms of sex were perversion. 

I entered Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi (aka Texas A&M with a much higher blood alcohol content) at 17, two days after graduation.  I had my first binge drinking experiences within a week and started smoking after two weeks.  I lost my virginity to a girl whose name I barely remember.  I spent my entire freshman year (and a few years after that) drunk and waking up with strange women.  Sex was as casual for me as a quick, "Hi, how are you doing?"  I lost count of the women I slept with and to this day don't even remember most of them.  The scariest part is, all of it was unprotected.  By all rights I should have caught something or impregnated someone.  This stemmed from a lack of real education.  Why?  Because no one really wanted to teach me the do's and don'ts of sex.  I am a statistical anomaly.  My unscathed survival is, to put it bluntly, an astronomically unlikely occurrence.

Our society encourages sex for minors by making it a dirty little secret.  The things I wanted most growing up were the ones that were taboo.  Drinking, smoking, and above all else sex held an overpowering allure for me.  The only reason I didn't lose my virginity until the age of 17 was that my parents kept me home under lock and key when I was not at school or work.  I only got to view the taboo things from a distance.  Since they were taboo the only way I could learn about them was through sources that, looking back, did not contain accurate information (porn, friends, HBO, etc.).  Looking at these things now I can see why this country is warped.

It is from that perspective that I approach the topic of sex.  The puritanical approach to sex education (or non-education) is getting innocent people killed and it is time it stops.  Our government refuses to allow teachers to fully address real questions about sex for fear of offending one puritanical group or another.  "Talking about sex honestly only encourages kids to have it" they say.  Don't talk about it and they WILL do it.

Further they regulate sexual activity between consenting adults who should be able to decide for themselves what they do with their partner(s).  Eva Longoria caught flak from ABC (a subsidiary of the Walt Disney Corporation and the network that shows Desperate Housewives, where her character has sex with a minor) for publicly stating that every woman should own a vibrator.  Women all over this country have to purchase toys for their own pleasure through private parties that are often raided by police because male politicians aren't secure enough in their manhood to understand most women can't orgasm from male penetration alone.  These male politicians also cannot grasp the idea that women masturbate for release just like men do.  If you believe men don't masturbate there is a call holding on line one for you from Santa Claus. 

The booming porn industry today shows that sex is definitely on our minds.  I personally enjoy a well made porn every now and then (ok, maybe more often than that).  Porn is good, in moderation.  Yes, it supports objectification of women.  So do bikinis, Victoria's Secret, and women themselves.  Get over it.  Porn should not be in the hands of anyone under (and many over) 18.  My reason is, it presents a fantasy.  In it all women orgasm on command and can bend into the shape of a pretzel.  Further, girls in porn are all willing to share.  This is rare in the real world.  Porn sets you up for failure unless you recognise the fantasy and distinguish it from reality.  Just like paintball does not prepare you for real combat, porn does not prepare you for sex.

Why do these myths persist?  Because our society frowns on free discussion of sex.  Children are told at a young age that masturbation will make them go blind or that an old bearded man in the sky who watches all they do will punish them for touching their own bodies.  When they ask where babies come from they get answers they learn are wrong in science class and learn to distrust their parents.  It is time we as a country get over our sexual hang ups.  If we can't be honest about something that is on our minds all the time, what can we be honest about?  The only people being helped by our current mindset on sex are psychologists who make millions every year counseling us about sexual hang ups and misinformation.

By the way, happy masturbation month.

5 comments:

d said...

raging cock monster.

...

you're right, it is fun to say.

that is all. <3

koreyj said...

Excellent post, dude. Excellent.

Angel said...

I grew up in a more open environment. I was informed and my folks (my mom more so) shared their own experiences with me. If I felt they went too far, all I had to do was say so...yet despite all the openness on the topic of sex in my folks' house, I still have not openly admitted having lost my virginity. Of course they know, I am living with my fiance and all...but something within me keeps me from uttering the words "I have sex" in front of my parents.

- Rev_Sapphire

PS: I waited until I was 21.

JC said...

I have addressed this situation with my own son, instead of singing lame kiddy songs like itsy bitsy spider to entertain him (he's 7 months old) I like to sing songs from the Rocky horror Picture Show.

I'm a sweet transvestite is his favorite.

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